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I'm mentioned once before that part of the reason I started blogging was because my head is constantly filled with thoughts. Some of the thoughts are good ones like dreams or goals of things I would like to accomplish in my lifetime and other thoughts are the non-helpful kinds...you know those kinds, the ones that sometimes hold you captive because they feed on your insecurities about your worth as a person and if you are actually worthy of any kind of love from anyone.
So today, I woke up feeling totally boggled down with thoughts....thoughts, thoughts and thoughts!!! And I am having both kinds of thoughts, they're warring with each other right now that's why I can't seem to make up my mind about anything today. Like I said, I have loads of things/projects I'd like to get to or finish but I just can't seem to make myself get to any of it.
Since I can't do that, I might as well come on today and just ramble on today. After all that is the name of this blog, no? I hope you don't mind me rambling on today...you will get probably confused and frustrated because there is no set pattern to my post today so if that happens to you, my deepest and most humble apology.
I feel frustrated a little with my hubby and my oldest child today yet at the same time, I am also excited for my oldest child. She will be graduating from High School next week (I will be dedicating a whole post to her next week) so I'm excited for her. But at the same time, lately she's been such a pain in my butt...she's usually the least demanding of my kids but lately she's been such a snob...a really bossy sort, to ME of all people. And my hubby, well, since he got his new job close to our home, he's been in such good mood and an over-all pleasant person to be around but at the same time it's driving me nuts because he's constantly doing things around the house and I feel like I'm not doing enough...now isn't that the craziest thing you've ever heard? Do you think maybe I need to get my head examined because I may be feeling jealous of my hubby because he actually found a job he enjoys, a boss he adores and co-workers who are wonderfully good to him? ME?! I can't even make up my own mind what I want to do with the measly few projects I should be working on? And no...if you're thinking that I'm feeling jealous because he might not be paying more attention to me...well it's the opposite, he pays too close attention to me...LOL. Maybe that's my problem. I think I'm just being paranoid that if he's this close and he actually scrutinize me, he'll find that I'm lacking in so may things.
See? Those ugly (insecure) thoughts are showing their faces...they're actually close to popping out of my head now.
Anyways, last Friday, I promised in this post that this week I will dazzle you all with my incredibly amazing mommy skill if you took pity on me and not tell on me for neglectful parenting skill. I will make good on my promise as soon as I organize all the wild thoughts in my head, how's that? I promise I will dazzle you with some of my most creative artful skillz dedicated to my kids as soon as I get all those in an organized bin..lol...and create a photographic evidence so you all can carry me around on your shoulders and shouting "hip hip hooray!!", deal? But for today, you'll just have to settle for this pathetic attempt of this would-pass-for-a-post nonsence of mine.
Did I ever tell you all how much I appreciate you all for reading this blog? Even though I don't get a gazillion comments in my comment box (being a vain human being, I also love to get comments), I know you guys are reading me and it means a great deal to this little islander! So for that, thank you.
Again, I apologize for this pathetic post but if you're up to something really dirty and nitty gritty, you can check me out again on this blog, I'm today's poster or contributor. If you are a member of my extended family, in-laws, to be specific, I would advice that you not read that post on that blog for today. But if you do decide to check out my post, I apologize in advance. That's all I can say for now.
As a parting thought....I LY all and hope you are all having a splendid week!!
12 comments:
haha - I have yet to be bold enough to let my family in on my Mars and Venus posts :)
nothing pathetic about a rambling post (if there were I'd have to qualify myself as pathetic), sometimes it just helps to sort out our feelings that way!
deep breaths - and we'll look forward to marching you around the blogosphere on our shoulders soon!
Your ramblings are great. I totally know the feeling of having so much to do that you do nothing. Happens to me all the time. LOL. Don't worry you'll get something done eventually, and there's always something to get done so chin up! Have a great day and just relax a little and if the hubby is stepping up his game, then let him and go get a pedicure!
You mean you have conflicting thoughts too? I have been having a really hard time lately with the negative ones taking over my brain. Monday I went out with some ladies from my ward on a boat and it was a "me-day" that hubby gave to me so that I could get my positive thoughts in charge again. Wasn't the end-all solution, but I am doing better now. Hope you get it together. Just know you are fabulous. I love reading your stuff, even if you feel like you are just rambling. Isn't that one of the great things about a blog? We get to choose what we put on here?
I love your posts. You might ramble a bit, but that's what I love. You are totally real and honest.
I love comments, too. It helps to know who stopped by and what they read. It is also feedback as to what people like to read.
T...I don't know if that is bold or a little stupid..I don't know how they'll react if they read my post.
And thanks for nice comment.
Eliza...ohhh I so would love to get me a pedi but I'm a bit embarrassed to have anyone besides my family touch my feet. I did manage to get my nails done so who knows, I may have to build up the courage to getting a pedi soon.
Oh Julie, I have thoughts going thoughts fighting one another in my head, I'm surprised I haven't ended up in a mental ward or something... And you're right, that is what blogging is about right? We can write about anything and everything our hearts desire. Glad you were able to get away from some "me" time. You need it after all that time alone with the kids while your hubby was away on his trip.
2busy..aww thank you so much. I feel totally flattered and yes I do like it when people leave me a comment..even if it is a short one, it's always good to read that someone else actually like what I write..so thank you.
There is nothing like some rambling to get your mind sorted out. That's what I have found out! I love your blog. I love reading it! thanks for sharing!
Oh Anjeny, we have so much in common. I hear you, girl. You're really good at analyzing yourself, btw. I think you're right on.
Thanks for being willing to be so open.
LY, girlfriend.
Aw April..thank you. I'm glad you like my blog and it makes me feel good to read you like reading my little tidbits.
Crash..aww, you're making my head swell with such words. Thanks for the love..I'm just happy to read you guys like what you're reading. And of course, I feel so much better to let some things out of my system or was that head?
We ALL have days like that, so don't worry! I am a list maker and I find that keeps me on track. Try it! HUGS!!!
I LOVE it when you ramble! And I hope you're having a splendid holiday weekend!!
Sounds like it's time to craft!!! Make a new, amazing card and then share it on your blog!
Hugs!
Thanks Val...I'm doing much better now.
Jeannie...thanks for hugs. Love your suggestion and that is precisely what I'm doing in the next post..thanks!
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